My relationships whether serious or casual seem to go through the same cycle: he finds me amazing, I am pursued heavily, I start to let my guard down and his interest fades, usually inexplicably. I tend to take it very personally even though I never have any solid evidence that my character or personality suddenly pushed him away.
My question is am I entitled to some sort of explanation as to why the interest waned? Will it do me any good? Does the reason really matter in the long run? I’m the type of person who over thinks everything. Typically, when the state of affairs changes abruptly, I can’t stop running things through my head, trying to pinpoint the exact moment or infraction that caused the shift.
I’m not sure why I do this. It never does me any good. Ultimately I don’t think it matters why he lost interest. There really isn’t anything I could have done to turn it around. If there was some aspect of my personality that caused the reversal, then so be it. If I had known what it was, I wouldn’t change who I am because one person was disinterested.
If it was something in his life that caused the drop off, there is nothing I could do to affect the situation. So no matter which way I look at it, it is out of my hands and on his head. I have to be secure enough in myself to not be distracted or influenced by a man who didn't realize my worth.