After some serious over-analysis of last night’s—or last week’s (depending on when I post this or when you read this I guess, whatever catch up here)—disaster as per my relentless, neurotic M.O., I’ve realized what a disease my involuntary fantasies can be. You know the ones. You meet a guy and one thing or another leads you to think, “hm he could be kinda great.” And this naturally leads to thoughts of which matching sweater vests you should wear in your Christmas card picture. Even though logically you know it probably won’t get past the first few glasses of wine after you somehow manage to insult his mother, favorite sports team and haircut—in that order. It’s hard to keep your mind from trotting along to some blissful utopian where he is thoughtfully arty, hates watching football and loves doing dishes.
Tick Tock
This post is going to be practically live-blogging magic right here. Partially because a post idea just popped into my mildly attractive little head and partially because I need to vent. Here’s the scoop, I had a date set for approximately four this evening with a young gent I met a couple weeks ago. He’s cute and seemingly sweet…BUT he postponed the first date for what was, at first, an indefinite amount of time. Then it turned into two hours. By this point I’m a little bit seething at myself for agreeing to wait like a pathetic little fool and a little bit ready to stick my carefully selected stiletto boot heel into his eye.
I’m So Awesome You Don’t Even Know
For those of us without Gwyneth legs, Marilyn eyes and Angelina lips (or, for the men, Brad abs, George eyes and Jon Hamm…well Jon Hammness), I think dating is a bit easier when we are forced to spend time with the potential love muffin prior to introducing romance to the situation. (Please don’t read this and then go off and kidnap that hot guy and hold him captive until Stolkholm syndrome sets in, you know that’s not what I mean.) I mentioned before that it’s easier to meet people in college, in part because you are around these people daily, giving love a chance to blossom gradually. Basically they get to know you and then they love you. In the real world it’s the opposite. I love you(r hair/eyes/biceps) so I will get to know you.
The State of Atrophying Etiquette As It Affects Dating
There are so many things in this modern life that would have Emily Post clutching her pearls if she were alive to witness them. Over-sharing via the Interwebz (I know, I know, I’m the pot), cell phones glued to hands and eyes glued to cell phones and ears glued to headphones during dinner with no regard for the company we are in and forget about the good old standards like standing up as a lady leaves the table or R.S.V.P.ing to an event.
Online Dating Saga Part 5: Annnnd I’m Done (For Now)
So my final day of eHarmony subscription was up this week. It marked the end of my online dating adventure. I had let my other profiles fall into the dusty, abandoned no man’s land where my Xanga and MySpace profiles have long resided. Still there, but likely to never be touched again (mostly because I’ve forgotten the passwords and don’t care to make the effort to shut them down.)
The Great Text Debate
I have gone around and around with a friend of the male-type persuasion about whether or not it is acceptable to text for a date. More specifically, the first date. In my apparently antiquated opinion, a call always trumps a text message in early dating situations. To me, a call indicates a higher level of respect than a flippant text. To him, I’m “weird” and “stuck in the ‘90s.” In his defense, I still struggle to swallow the concept of an e-book. I like my printed books dammit! They smell nice and look really pretty and pretentious on my oversized bookshelves.
Sordid Histories on a Need-To-Know Basis
The dance between revealing too much or too little about your relational history can be a delicate one. As per my recent M.O. (because my own personal experiences have fallen off a cliff into turbulent waters like a spurned lover in a maritime romance novel) I came upon this topic after watching Chasing Amy. It, naturally, led to an argument with a friend about Joey Lauren’s honesty or lack thereof. I thought she had willfully deceived poor, misdirected Ben Affleck (though his solution was abhorrent and a tad insane). My friend thought she had skillfully avoided being dishonest on a technicality.
Six Years Later “The Game” Still Has Our Attention?
Years ago I read “The Game” mostly out of morbid curiosity and the desire for a mindless read. I didn’t take it too seriously and imagined it was a fad that would quickly fade. Apparently I was sadly mistaken given the fact that the practices employed by the author are alive and unwell to this day. Well, alive enough that this blogger found it worth writing about. Despite the chastising intentions laid out in the headline, 95 percent of the post explores how these skeevy pick-up artists are “meeting a very real need.”
I’ll Call You (Not Really)
We’ve all experienced the empty “I’ll call you.” Well all of us except those intensely beautiful, leggy girls (I hate you by the way). And despite the ubiquity of the phenomenon I am still baffled by it. I guess I can understand it when the promise is slurred as Saturday night draws to a close and you truly believe in your stupor that this is the one for you. After all she shares your love of cheap beer and secret obsession with single-name pop artists who struggle to locate the “s” on their keyboard.
The Online Saga Part 4: The Land of 1001 First Dates
I’ve quickly come to realize the world of online dating is simply one in which first dates are handed out like urine mints in a classy restaurant. Just as in a bar setting, most individuals are willing to take an hour or two to get to know a stranger they consider at least somewhat attractive. Initially upon embarking on this online endeavor I considered that one (if not the only) benefit of online dating would be the ability to pre-screen my prospects and filter out the definite “no’s” before wasting time with the face-to-face step. And while this is valid on some level, I’m beginning to think the main difference between online dating and the bar scene seems to be more in volume rather than quality of match (also the sky is blue).