Sometimes it feels damn good to have that mushy, connected-deeply-to-another-soul crap in our lives doesn’t it? So much so that you’ll go to strange (though maybe not great) lengths to get it from places and people you maybe shouldn’t. Most likely from some guy (or girl) who is there to fill in for just long enough to make you feel loveable and capable of real human emotions on occasion. Because sometimes you forget how to feel feelings when you aren’t constantly bickering with the one you love. And that’s no good, right? So what better way to deal with it than some truly unhealthy and delusional fauxmance? (See what I did there? That’s a portmanteaux kids. Pretend like nobody’s ever used that blend before.)
Hear No Evil See No Evil Post No Evil
Last week Cheaterville.com was in the “news” for a sketchy ad they had designed to apparently warn the celebrities of the Toronto Film Festival against stepping out on their significant others between indie screenings and Q and A sessions. The concept of the site is similar to the original intent of Dontdatehimgirl.com, before they gave over to pressure (and, seemingly, human decency). Basically when someone feels they’ve been wronged by a cheating spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend/unusually close pet, they take to the site to rant in horrific detail about the transgressions of the trollop/whatever the male version of a trollop is. Best of all they get to include pictures and a detailed description of the cheater including height, weight, location, ethnicity and sign—the FBI doesn’t have files this extensive.
I’m So Awesome You Don’t Even Know
For those of us without Gwyneth legs, Marilyn eyes and Angelina lips (or, for the men, Brad abs, George eyes and Jon Hamm…well Jon Hammness), I think dating is a bit easier when we are forced to spend time with the potential love muffin prior to introducing romance to the situation. (Please don’t read this and then go off and kidnap that hot guy and hold him captive until Stolkholm syndrome sets in, you know that’s not what I mean.) I mentioned before that it’s easier to meet people in college, in part because you are around these people daily, giving love a chance to blossom gradually. Basically they get to know you and then they love you. In the real world it’s the opposite. I love you(r hair/eyes/biceps) so I will get to know you.
The State of Atrophying Etiquette As It Affects Dating
There are so many things in this modern life that would have Emily Post clutching her pearls if she were alive to witness them. Over-sharing via the Interwebz (I know, I know, I’m the pot), cell phones glued to hands and eyes glued to cell phones and ears glued to headphones during dinner with no regard for the company we are in and forget about the good old standards like standing up as a lady leaves the table or R.S.V.P.ing to an event.